not_quite_there | (no subject)

*gasp* Who? Details!! Pics! ;)

Not telling. Just, the last person I kissed before this was you. Don't quite know what I'm doing.

If it makes you happy, that's what's important. *hug*

And no stealing boys from me! :P

I would never steal boys from you.

I don't know if it makes me happy. I think it does...

Well I'll keep my fingers crossed for you! You deserve to be happy.

You don't have to make it sound like it's serious or anything..

Sweetie, it is serious! You put yourself out there! That's so superamazinglyawesome!!

Well, he kissed me first.

You don't have to wear a big sign saying "Want to make out with hot guy!" to be putting yourself out there. :P

So, is he hot?

Yeah, he kind of is.

Football hot or swimmer hot?

Er, I don't know the difference.

*sigh* How can you not? Well, I guess you're new to this. *giggle* K, football hot is big muscles, swimmer hot is sleek and streamlined but not a bit scrawny. Then there's gymnast hot which is kinda in the middle plus really bendy. Oh! Almost forgot nerdy hot. No muscles but smart and cute.

Sort of swimmer hot I guess? Somewhere between that and football, I think..

And no, I'm not telling you who it is unless it turns into something more than a kiss.

But what if I accidentally throw myself at him? I'd be all embarrassed and you'd be hurt and I'd feel just awful!

Best for you to tell me now and avoid all the pain. Plus Jinx has her eye on someone and I need to know if I need to let her down easy!

Not going to be hurt, Gwynnie. Through yourself at whoever you like.

Told you, it's nothing serious.

Nope. If there's even a chance you might be onto something, I'm not risking it. And I don't throw myself at anyone! :P

Still not telling you. Sorry.

:P

What was it like?

No wait, stupid question.

You like him?

It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.

I think? I'm not sure. He's nice to look at. And he supposedly likes looking at me.

Why did you think it'd be bad? Kissing's one of those things that's generally supposed to be good, isn't it?

That sounds like a decent start.

Because I haven't done it since the eighth grade. And I assumed I just wouldn't you know. Still can't understand why anyone would like looking at me.

Maybe he doesn't just look at you, but actually sees you. You're a really good guy. The scars are a part of you, but they aren't all of you.

Can I ask your advice on something?

Sure. Ask me anything.

What do you think Colwyn wants from me?

Oh, and, are you ever going to tell me who you kissed? I'm figuring you'll do that again, too. But I'm not Gwyn -- I won't marry you off immediately to whoever it is, promise.

Colwyn? No idea. I barely know him anymore. We were friends before...

Now, well, since then really, he can't stand to be around me, so I don't have a good read on him. He's a Sidhe, though, so keep that in mind.

I know he's a Sidhe. I'm not a giant; he can't control me. I just can't figure out why he sought me out at the carnival. Or gave me a key.

He can't stand to be around you? Because of what happened? I don't like that.

And I'll take the lack of answer as a no on my other question. :)

He sought you out and gave you a key? A key to what? You've been holding out on me.

He can't stand to look at me.

It's just well, it really was just a kiss, well, a few kisses. But I don't think it really matters who it was unless it happens again or becomes a thing. And I'm not sure if that'll happen.

No, the key was after. I was at the carnival and he caught up with me. We got to talking about the art projects I had planned, and he told me about this guy who sold old keys. So we went over and I got a bunch for projects, and he picked out some skeleton keys. I guess he likes them. Then we went on the Scrambler, and I went out of my body while we were spinning, and he got... upset after. Hurt. Gave me one of the keys he'd bought and walked off.

I gave him a box to hold the keys for his birthday. I don't know why except I had this idea and I knew it was his when I made it. SO I guess we're even.

And he's being an ass, then. It's not like you're not a person still.

I won't push about it. I was just curious.

Don't people understand that going out of body doesn't mean you don't like the person.

That's odd... I don't know what any of it means. I mean, I get the making something and knowing who its for occasionally, but it's odd. Maybe Colwyn's just odd.

It's Colwyn. Would he even care if I liked him? I mean, we aren't friends.

I was just overwhelmed. There was too much going on, and we were spinning.

Maybe he's changed? Or changing? I don't know. Maybe he wants to be your friend.

I know. I understand how it works. Sometimes it's voluntary, sometimes it isn't.

You think that's what he wants from me? Why me?

I don't know. You could just ask him...

Yeah, that doesn't work so well. Never mind. If he's being an ass to you, it doesn't really matter if he's trying to be nice to me.

You don't need to be like that. He's not actively being an ass to me... I think he just can't stand to be around me. Never really asked him about it. Though sometimes I pop up in front of him without warning him. Guess that makes me a bit of an ass.

Are you doing it just to piss him off? Or do you just want him to see you?

I want to see if I can get him to look me in the eyes. Of course, it is kind of fun to watch him turn away horrified.

When we came back to school after the accident, it was our first day of upper school. They'd let us room together and he walked out of the room after seeing me and then petitioned for a room change.

That's pretty much the definition of asshole, right there, I think.

Him or me? Probably both.

It is possible he changed in four years, you know...

Maybe both.

And maybe he has, but maybe he hasn't. He's Sidhe.

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